Letting go of old fears

I've been listening to Dr. Wayne Dyer's Book The Power of Intention on CD. I had started the book and got half way through when I ended up reading another book. I've meant to get back to the book but haven't. I was very pleased when a friend gave me the CD. It was another sign I need to read this book.
I'm almost through with it and I definitely encourage everyone to read or listen to this. I find listening to him is even more empowering, using my sense of hearing.

There is so much that can be said about this book that is too lengthy to discuss on a blog, but each time I listen to a section I'm immediately drawn to my life and how what he is saying applies to it or how I can apply what he is saying. It's so moving.

One thing for sure I know is I need to work on my affirmations. I've been doing well so far and yet I think I should concentrate on only a few at a time. I have a tendency to become scattered and now my new affirmation for this is. I am calm and able to concentrate on any situation with ease.

My body is over weight which has bothered me since I was about twelve years old. The odd thing is when I was twelve years old I really wasn't over weight. Yet this is when I began to think I was. This is when I began to diet and exercise and so forth to shed the unwanted pounds that seriously wasn't there. This was in my mind however, planted firmly by well meaning friends, family members and media.

Listening to Dr. Wayne Dyer has helped me to realize that I am NOT my body. I am perfectly created. So with that in mind I am feeling better about myself. I am also taking a look at my list of things that I want to do and on this list I have wanted to learn Yoga since I was a teen. I would watch the poses and see the look of serenity on their faces and think, Wow I'd like to do that. So why haven't I learned it you ask? Because of well meaning family members telling me that it is a religion and to stay away from it. The same well meaning friends telling me that meditation is basically evil and you need to pray not meditate. Which I stayed away from meditation too.

But I always wanted to learn to meditate and I wanted to learn Yoga. So now that I began to release the undesired ropes holding me down I started meditation first. I will be honest I was worried at first but my overwhelming desire to meditate and bring a sense of calmness, peace to my troubled mind outweighed my “fears”. What I found was truly an amazing place to be in. When I meditate I find the peace I need.

I was telling a friend the other day of one of my first experiences meditating. It was perhaps my fourth or fifth time. I was reading a great book the Master Key System. And I was trying to bring about nothingness, the absence of thought. Which isn't easy but I was able to do this several times for split seconds. Then soon I relaxed and began to float in my mind. I was repeating the words “I'm in unity with the Universe.” in my mind. Softly spoken in my thoughts, repeatedly. Suddenly everything just became white washed, the only way I can describe it. I felt myself floating in my mind and body, swaying back and forth on this sea of white. I felt suddenly connected to everyone and everything. I was calmly connected in this vast sea of white. It was very beautiful to feel and I felt so connected in such a soothing way. It was as if I belonged and I knew I belonged.

It is in the silence that we hear God speak to us.

So now... I'm also planning on learning Yoga.

We are in control.

I watched the movie What the Bleep Do We Know several years ago and it was a validation of what I had been reading in other things. It didn't mention the Law of Attraction per-say but it was leading me in this direction. Watching this movie however opened up what I had been dealing with at the time and that simply realizing that we are in control of our lives.

I've lived the first 30+ years feeling not in control. Everywhere I looked I was being told that destiny, Fate or God is in control and to be honest I was unhappy about it. Of course I didn't know I was unhappy about it, because I was just going through life feeling powerless to change it.

We are told that we are powerless and to let God handle this and let God handle that. Then if it doesn't go as we asked or planned then it's either our fault because we didn't do something right or it's because it's not God's will. But God has been so removed that he is separate from us.

I have to tell you I know what God's will is now for me and that's simply My Will. God gives us Free Will. We are in control. This was a life changing event for me. That has continued to grow over the years.

The next life changing event was watching The Secret another major stepping stone in changing my life for the better. I have bought the DVD of both these movies and I've bought several books on the Law of Attraction.

But before I stray down the rabbit hole... let me get back to being in control. First off this is so frightening or it was at least for me when I realized I was in control all along. Wow what a wake up call to realize everything that has gone bad is basically my doing. But lets not lay this guilt on because everything good is my doing too. Hmmm. Now came the big question. What do I do now?

Well I don't know about anyone else, but I cried. Because the first thing I did was forgive myself for my ignorance in not knowing and I knew from that moment on I would now be in control. I also knew I was learning and this whole Universe was open and new and I could be anything I wanted. The very best part about this is I knew I was in control. Once you realize you're in control, you'll never go back, because the knowledge is there.

I began a true journey of within, one I am still on. One I've chosen to share with those who would like to listen. I'm in control of my mind, my body and my soul. I think however I was only half connected. It's like the knowledge was always there I just couldn't connect to it and now I'm bridging these gaps and what is happening is this great whole new me.

I am who I want to be. I am who I will to be.

Sleeping and Drepression

I think it's safe to say most people know that a sign of depression is wanting to sleep a lot. I was depressed at one time and I can say, Yes, I did like to sleep a lot. I'm sure there are a lot of rational reasons about it biologically - medically and so forth. Some call it escapism.

However...

I've been reading a lot about how when we sleep we are actually closer to our joy/happiness/peace. Abraham-Hicks in several of their books they mention when we sleep we close this gap moving closer to our joy and to God basically.

So this has me thinking one day. People who are depressed... are they trying to escape from this life? Or are they trying to put themselves back together, closer to God and joy. Biologically speaking our bodies know when we are out of harmony and it produces whatever is needed to put us back into homeostasis.

Who is to say that being sad and depressed doesn't make our bodies respond chemically to produce this sleep so we might close the gap bringing us closer to God and joy.

Now please do not get me wrong I'm not advocating let everyone who is depressed sleep. However what I am saying is, our bodies are speaking to us all the time we just need to listen. If you suddenly find yourself wanting to sleep all the time and it's not due to lack of sleep perhaps you are needing to get back in touch with your soul and reach out to God for your joy.

Joy comes from within each of us and if you are turning inward - to sleep - perhaps it's time to wake up and make the conscience effort to find this joy that's within you.

Sometimes sleeping too much is actually a wake up call.

Moving Forward continued

The subject did come up quite quickly when I went to work and amazingly enough I spoke passionately about it and yet I was fine with any and every outcome. So I was able to move forward.

I'd meditated and given it to God and what I was given in return was quite simple. I realized I shouldn't give it any negative energy. The more energy and time I give it the more it will produce undesired results. So I said my peace a bit passionately and then I released it.

The great part about it is I know inside I'm fine with it and I have moved on.

Moving Forward

I often tell other people and myself that it is important to move forward. Today I am at a place where I thought I had moved forward on a certain subject and found I haven't. So just for the record... this sucks.

I woke up this morning dreaming about the subject and this made me realize its not dealt with and released. So obviously I told myself to just let it go but in fact I buried it instead. So this morning I've been contemplating on how to actually go about letting it go. I think I will do a visualization with mediation. Where I actually visualize letting it go into the hands of God while I'm meditating.

Tonight the subject will arrive and I will know if this has worked when I am confronted with it on how I react and how it makes me feel inside.

My first blog

Well here it is. I have so many thoughts and I figure this is a great way to get them across.

I think its amazing how the Universe works. How we attract to us what we need to know. I also love how we can connect things. I had been listening to and reading a couple of books by Abraham-Hicks. Something impressed me was that sometimes we just need to take a step back to get relief.
We may be angry and we cannot jump from anger to joy, we just need to take a small step toward joy, which could even be revenge (thoughts) that give us relief. The point is that we get relief from the anger. Of course we don't stay in the revenge thoughts we move again towards joy and again we will get relief from the revenge. This can take several steps or many steps all dependent on us. The point is receiving relief and moving towards joy.

I next read Getting into the Gap by Dr. Wayne Dyer. He explains in his book about the sound of God is "Ahhh". This is the sound we use in meditation. I found this so fascinating.

A day or so later I'm at work and it suddenly strikes me. What sound do we make when we find relief? Yep that's right - Ahhh, which according to Dr. Wayne Dyer is the sound of God.

So now I truly to believe that is the sound of God is Ahhh and we should seek this sound in our quiet meditations or in those times of need of relief. Allow this sound to help move you closer to God.